Regards,
Tony
But where is your son? Is even in your jurisdiction now? It is unfortunately common for some women to try and play the DM card. Sounds like you have some good lawyers. The best you can do is gather as much as you can to show your productiveness in society and how she is unfit. Your lawyers should be digging digging digging. What was the ruling on the protection order? Those are decided by a county court judge or district court judge not a family court judge. Protection orders have to be approved. They are not just filed and automatically in effect.
It sounds to me like she thought this was going to be a slam dunk and she was mistaken. I'll be blunt, this type of case is who can make the other look worse. That's how this works. Any crimes, stays in mental institutions, history of drug and or alcohol abuse, DM, anything to show she is a danger to your son. If you can not prove she is an outright danger to your son, you will both get some sort of joint custody. Unless you get that protection order processed. Don't know the NY state limit on days to have it processed.
Regards,
Tony
Do you know where your son is right now? You know if she does not have complete custody and no orders are against you then you can legally call the police and have them meet you where your son is. If you have them documents of proof. The only way that can be stopped is if she is on the other side of the door. No one "trumps" mom and dad. Seriously, I see it a lot.
I would not hesitate to turn any documents you have against her. Get her crimes on the books. Get the police report. If you hesitate with this information it will not look good. This is my opinion.
Sorry about the delay. I was offline for a while.
Regards,
Tony
Remember something too. You never want to appear vindictive or threatening. You only want whats best for your son. I know this situation is angering but do not let it show. Make sure you have character witnesses on standby for your court. In person is always recommended. Some judges could care less about letters of character. If anyone besides you can show up and testify to her dangerous behavior this would be good. Your word against hers is one thing but others is better.
Regards,
Tony
Your lawyer is the one making this case for you, what does he/she say about this SS card incident? If it were me I would call the SS administration. They may take a bigger notice to this. You can contest the protection order you know? The immediate ones are only good for 3 days, think, and the ones that last for a longer time have to be served to you and then you have so long to contest it. They do this because many women use this as a way to manipulate the system that is already on the side of the mother as it is.
You have a right to your copy of that protection order. If you have not received one you want to request one. A lot can be told from that. If you can disprove what she says as a lie then go contest it. Or at least prepare a statement showing how she abuses the system for personal gain.
Tony
Anything you can do to prove her decisions are dangerous, negligent and illegal will reflect on her parenting abilities as well. They need to be brought out in the open to the proper authorities.
Their is a lot of corruption with lawyers and judges and manipulation of the laws. Take time to plan your defense as well. You can believe she is readying as well. So concentrate, why do you deserve custody? What will you say when she throws her "bombs" in your direction. Write things down so you don't forget them.
Your welcome. Good luck to you. Thanks again for using FixYa.
Regards,
Tony
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This is a tough question. How old is your child/children? As a rule, the courts will, at minimum give you joint custody with visitation, and if the allegations of domestic violence can be founded, you will need to have supervised visitation. The real question is can she provide statements from family, friends and neighbors to support Domestic Violence allegations? If you think she is able to provide this defense, I suggest you enroll yourself in a DM course as soon as possible. You will need to file a motion with the Family Court to prevent her from relocating out of state until the Court case is resolved.
Look, the issue here us not about you and not about your wife, it is about the child/children and their best interest. Generally the courts are inclined to rule in favor of the mother as the primary care giver, but make sure the father is given rights to visitation. MAINTAIN YOUR COOL IN COURT. ONLY SPEAK WHEN THE JUST SPEAKS TO YOU. ONLY ADDRESS THE COURTS QUESTIONS AND DO NOT ELABORATE. BE RESPECTFUL TO ALL PARTIES. ADDRESS THE JUDGE AS "YOUR HONOR" FOR ALL RESPONSES.
REMEMBER, THIS IS ABOUT YOUR KID/S AND NOT YOU AND YOUR PROBLEMS WITH YOUR EX. SO ADDRESS THESE ISSUES. IF YOUR EX CANNOT SHOW VIABLE MEANS OF SUPPORT FOR THE CHILDREN AND YOU CAN, BRING BANK STATEMENTS, TAX RETURNS, PAY STUBS OR WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO PROVE YOU CAN PROVIDE A FIT HOME FOR YOUR CHILD.
Legally, she is allowed to take your son out of the state, without your permission, just not out of the country.I would not tell the court you married for her green card as this is illegal and calls into question your integrity. She MAY AND PROBABLY will bring it up and you should keep quiet until the judge asks you direct questions about this matter. Answer briefly and do not go into detail. She stands the chance of being deported for her admission to this crime. You should immediately be prepared to demand primary custody of your son. Remember, a Green Card is a work Visa and may be revoked at any time.
BE PREPARED TO HAVE YOUR SON SAY THINGS AGAINST YOU AS YOUR EX WILL HAVE COACHED AND POTENTIALLY THREATENED YOUR CHILD INTO LYING. REQUEST THE JUDGE TO TAKE YOUR SON INTO CLOSED CHAMBERS AND ASK YOUR SON THE QUESTIONS HE/SHE WANTS ANSWERED. THIS WILL PREVENT YOUR CHILD FROM LYING AND JUDGE'S KNOW HOW TO TREAT THIS MATTER WITH KID GLOVES, WHILE GETTING THE ANSWERS THEY NEED. ASK THE COURT TO ASK YOUR SON WHOM HE WOULD PREFER TO LIVE WITH AND WHY. ASK THE COURT TO CONFISCATE HER PASSPORT TO PREVENT HER FROM LEAVING THE COUNTRY LEGALLY. ADVISE THE COURT SHE IS A FLIGHT RISK AND THAT SHOULD YOU WIN, YOU REQUIRE SUPERVISED VISITATION FOR HER VISITS TO YOUR SON.
BE CAREFUL WITH YOUR EVIDENCE, AS IT CAN ALSO BE USED AGAINST YOU, AS HARASSMENT OR POTENTIALLY DOMESTIC VIOLENCE (VERBAL), IF SHE CLAIMS THERE WERE THREATENING PHONE CALLS ON YOUR PART. IT IS NOT ILLEGAL TO TELL SOMEONE YOU INTEND TO TAKE THEIR KIDS AWAY FROM THEM, UNLESS IT IS FOR THE DEMAND OF SOME OTHER REMUNERATION, SUCH AS CASH OR PROPERTY. TREAD LIGHTLY ON THESE MATTERS AS WHAT WE FEEL MAT BE REPREHENSIBLE AND IMMORAL DOES NOT MATTER IN THE EYES OF THE LAW. SHE MAY BE THE WORST PERSON IN THE WORLD, BUT YOUR CASE HAS TO BE ABOUT WHO IS THE BEST PARENT AND WHO CAN BEST PROVIDE FOR A SECURE AND STABLE ENVIRONMENT FOR THE CHILD. THIS IS NOT ABOUT YOU AND HER, THIS IS ABOUT YOUR CHILD. REMIND YOURSELF ABOUT THIS OVER AND OVER AGAIN.
IN YOUR COURT MATTER, DO NOT ADDRESS HER IN ANY WAY, ADDRESS THE COURT AND THE COURT ONLY. IF YOU DISAGREE WITH SOMETHING SHE HAS SAID, GOLD YOUR ****** UNTIL YOU ARE ASKED TO RESPOND AND RESPOND IN A CALM AND CLEAR MANNER. MAINTAIN YOUR VOLUME AND YOUR TEMPER. REMEMBER, YOUR SON WILL PROBABLY BE THERE. IF NOT, YOU NEED TO ASK THE COURT TO HAVE HER PRODUCE YOUR CHILD IMMEDIATELY, NICELY AND POLITELY. DO YOU SEE WHERE i AM GOING WITH THIS.
I ASSUME YOU ARE IN NEW YORK, PHILADELPHIA OR SOMEWHERE ON THE EAST COAST. YOU ARE THREE HOURS AHEAD OF ME. THIS IS A BIG DEAL AND THERE IS SO MUCH MORE TO ADVISE YOU ON. WHAT TIME IS YOUR COURT CASE BEING HEARD?
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Ok he is 5yrs old and i was the one who took her to court and i was the one who got the order of protection from her. She never took me to court. As far as DV is concerned she does not have any witnesses Nor does she have any police reports, hospital stays, etc. I have 3 on her. I married her so she could get her green card and before she got it 8months ago in 2010 she gave the motor vehicle a fake ss card and they confiscated it. Then she had a appt with the dmv police where they had her sign a wavier of administration hearing to keep her out of jail. Im bringing that paperwork to court also. Because she is not a person that has the intrest of my son doing **** like that. Plus i have 74pages of text messages from may 2011 her stating that she will take my son and i wont know where she lives don't ask. And she goes on about it. I'm in hopes that the court will grant me temp full custody so i can continue providing for my son he is already registered for school and since she has him in a shelter with her thats not the best place for him to be. With all the **** i have on her im optimistic they will grant me that, pls advise?
Hey ok, well the court date was yesterday and she came there without my son. Now since she is playing the domestic violence victim and is in a shelter called "the sanctuary for families" they appointed her a lawyer actually she was there with 2 lawyers one was an assistant lawyer. My lawyer told me prior to that. She and her lawyers filed a order of protection and a petition for custody of my son the day before. Now mind you all of this was done just yesterday. My petition was filed since aug 17, 2011. So she is looking like a real ******** right now. She did not speak to me although she looked like she wanted to but her lawyers were sitting on either side of her like body guards. Their lawyers argued and argued but my lawyers was firing off like crazy she was very effective. My lawyer got me a order that my son cannot leave the jurisdiction without my consent. So now we goto trial on sept 20th 2011. Pls advise.
Oh and yes the case is in new york and the bronx family court. It is such a pleasure speaking with you and i await your response.
Hey tony well i been had a order of protection on her since aug 18 2011, she just filed for one sept 9th when we went to court. Well i definately have enough to make her look bad in addition to that. When she got her divorce in june 2006 on a page in that in which she wrote in her own hand writing. She states she is 9 months pregnant and about to give birth anyday now. My son was born july 28th, 2006 i also had a dna test done from geneticas that states my son is 99.999% mine. So that means she commited adultry had *** with me while married to another man at that time.
Hey did you get my last response?
I mentioned to u she was nearly arrested at the DMV last year because she submitted a fake social security card but with her real number and they confiscated it. They had her sign a administrative waver of a hearing and she had her privleges revoked for 90 days and had to pay a surcharge. When i was going through her stuff she left behind it was alot of her personal documentation and i found another fake ss card with her signature on it. Im thinking about bringing that to 26 federal plaza where we did her immagration stuff or better yet bring it to the social security office like 10 minutes from my house. This way they can pick her *** up because when they see the DMV incident and that. Im sure they wont take that lightly. I will turn her *** in with all the stuff that i can prove for her taking my son, pls advise?
I do know where my son is currently he is in the shelter with her called safe haven it's in the city. She does not have complete custody but she does have a order of protection that was granted to her by the court this past friday. But as far as custody neither myself or her has it it's both equal at this time. But yes i am looking out for the well being of my son. She has not had him even call me since aug 15th through current. Regardless of how she may feel about me, he has nothing to do with that. Since she is having him suffer from the lifestyle my son has with me to be subjected to that shelter **** with nothing she has another thing comming. Thats why i want to goto the ss office with the fake ss card that she signed and present that to them along with the dmv incident. Im quite sure they would be interested and quite possibly have her picked up and placed in jail. She gives mothers a bad name truly. Making a child suffer because of some personal issue she has with me. Do you think i should goto the ss office or goto the police? sometimes the police don't do **** thats why i figured the ss office.
Yes i do have a character witness on standby and i told my attorney of it and we will be getting coached this week by my attorney of what to expect i agree with you tony to never appear vindictive or threatening. But she will get screwed tastefully. Pls advise
Hey Tony, Yes i received the copy of the order and complete BS we goto trial on sept 20th 2011 i will definitely call or goto the ss administration tomorrow and get the ball rolling with that. Cause with the whole homeland security thing and all im sure they will issue a warrant for her arrest before court or may even pick her up in the court.
ok i will definitely make that happen cause it's her real signature written in pen on the fake card it will be a easy match. I will get in touch with ss tomorrow cause they as u said will take it very seriously. She must stand up for her actions. And afterwards i want to see what her pro bono lawyers have to say about that at the sanctuary for families, that feel their clients can do no wrong check these links out i researched
i was looking up some information about Sanctuary for Families don't know if this would be helpful but here it go anyway it's somethings about a corrupt attorney that they had representing Sanctuary for Families dont know if that attorney is still there because when you research her at lawyers.com no number available. Click on links below:
http://www.angelfire.com/ny4/themismaat/
http://foros.terra.com/foros/new_york/Ne...
http://www.angelfire.com/ny4/themismaat/...
http://www.lawyers.com/New-York/New-York...
http://www.anusha.com/theresa.htm
ok will do thank u so much :-).
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