The fuel pump is not geting power . and I cant find the relay

Get a test light and test the wires going to it ground one end and see if you have power at the pump. If not do the same at the fuses so where you are not geting the power.

There isn't a "reset" button for your vehicle. There is a fuse and a fuel pump relay. They are both located in the box in the right hand front corner in the engine compartment. Below is a diagram of both the fuses and the relays and the are both marked as fuel pump or fuel pu,p relay. If you have checked and are not geting power to the fuel pump, I would start there then check for a good ground and then check the wiring. Wish it were like a Ford that has a reset but it does not. Hope this helps a litle anyway.

Check all related fuses and there should be a fuel pump relay also. Not sure where it is located on your vehicle. Check those first and make sure the connector at the fuel pump is not damaged. They had a problem with some of those connectors and have upgraded ones that can be installed.

check the fuel pump relay

have you verified a lack of voltage at the connector at the tank? if so, check for a fuel pump relay under the hood. your local auto parts store can show you its location. also, any repair shop can too using a "parts locator guide."

CHECK THE INERTIA SWITCH FIRST , IT'S LOCATED BEHIND THE PASSENGER SIDE KICK PANEL THERE IS A ACCESS HOLE TO CHECK RESET BUTTON.. CHECK FOR POWER AT THE TERMINALS WHILE THERE ...THE FUEL PUMP WILL RECIEVE POWER FOR 2 SECONDS WHEN IGNITION IS TURNED ON IF NO POWER (12VOLTS) CHECK FUEL PUMP RELAY IN ENGINE COMPARTMENT RELAY BOX , IF NEEDED SWAP RELAYS AND RETEST , ALSO THE POWER RELAY SUPPLIES VOLTAGE TO PCM WHICH IN TURN ENERGIZES FUEL PUMP RELAY SO CHECK BOTH RELAYS ALSO

HOPE THIS HELPS

Did you replace the fuel pump with a NEW fuel pump, or a used one?
Get in the car, insert key and turn to "On". Do not attempt to start. Do you hear the fuel pump run for a few moments? Try it a few times, starting the car each time after you hear the fuel pump run. If the fuel pump does not run, then chances are, it's a bad fuel pump.
It could also be the fuel pressure regulator, located on the fuel rail.

Your statement about the oil is confusing.

The fuel pump power on the Windstar is controlled by a component called a Constant Control Relay Module (CCRM).
Its located located on the driver's side of the engine compartment.