Have 2003 vw beetle convertible have been told relay under dash has a fuse on relay that controls top going up and down could someone explain in detail where it is located

buy a new motor for your top

Check the headlight relay if its getting power.If the relay is getting power then most provable culprit will be the headlight switch.

Fuses are located in under dash fuse/relay box ,driver side above data link

If what i had given earlier for the reset didnt work, the motors may be burned out.

My mother is having the same problem with her 2005 vw beetle too ... i looked in the fuse box, and i think i found the fuse that has blown ... i dont know about yours .. but hers would not even attempt to put the top down at all ... so i figured it had to be a blown fuse... ill be replacing it tomorrow if it is that ill let you know .. i cant remember the exact spot off hand, but i know it was a 25 amp yellowish fuse

As you see in the first illustration. you can use your key to pry open the cover. It may or it may not contain the fuse locator card.

Sounds like a window regulator clip problem. VW extended the warranty on these years ago, but only on front windows.
It's possible vw might do it under warranty. Call their 1-800 # and ask...
There are tutorials on how to replace one online, but it's pretty involved...

OPEN L/S DOOR , PULL END CAP OFF DASH , FUSE BOX LOCATED THERE W/ SOME RELAYS & REST ARE UNDER L/S OF DASH OR UNDER HOOD

yes there is a relay under the hood, usually located in the power distribution box and if that doesnt fix it, try checking the low pressure switch, located on the accumulator or the low pressure line. You can check this by unplugging the two wire pigtail and completing the circut with a paperclip