I'm afraid there is no solution for that.
****-lets be sure:
- Of your remaining die hard acquaintances, do any of them seem to be bleeding from the eyes?
- Have you heard remarks like, 'That must be what EVIL smells like' and 'OMG, I'm Blind'?
- Have you noticed sudden migrations of birds
- On clear days, do there always seem to be local cloud formations wherever you go?
- Can you fart 'Home on the range? On Key?
If you answered yes to any six of these five questions you may be suffering from Colon Breath. Though probably not as much as your family, coworkers and anyone downwind are suffering.
They say acceptance is the first step toward recovery.
However, in cases of CB, acceptance will be about it.
The best you can hope for is to try to alleviate the symptoms through diet, exercise and liberal amounts of Holy Water in the hope of achieving a state of remission, called SCB (Semi-Colon Breath).
May I suggest Friends2Listen........1 2 1 therapy without the projectile vomiting of a visit to the doctor.........
In the meantime, clench those cheeks together.